Well

This sucks...


my eyes hurt from crying.I wont ever forget september 29 sadly cuz it was my best friend's birthday :/

..

I am thankful for the things I have.

The people around me and my love.


I'm sure God has something better for me... maybe working there wasn't going to help me at all.

T.I.T.S.

Yeah, that's right... T.I.T.S. http://slugbox.deviantart.com/journal/35262565/

Something only Slugbox on dA would do xD Yeah it's a contest and I might do it. It's challenging? Sexy women killing things with tentacles... and being....sexy?
har. I dunno..

and today's my second day of work and it was okay. I have to get used to stupid people asking for copies and for impossible logos and backgrounds. Impossible? cuz they ALWAYS go "I NEED THIS FOR TODAY AT 2" and its around 10 am ._ .
I told my boss I don't work under pressure and I HATE being rushed when it comes to things like that. She's gonna do something about that hopefully.
I'm GLAD this magazine is not monthly... doing this alone would have driven me insane.


ANYWAY, CRAMPS. OW. RIGHT NOW FFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFF

I goes to bed now... Whoever is reading this lol. xD

night~

Job?

Not anymore.

I know I can't be picky when it comes to that but I can't tolerate the shit I have to do there. I have patience with some things but not with everything. The fact that I have to sit in a damn cubicle talking my ass off for almost 10 hrs makes me want to punch people. One? I HATE insisting on people. That I have to do if they don't want to talk. Two? I don't want to smile/talk like a robot. Third? I can't go to school if i stay. Mom managed to pay for my 3 classes this period and I can't just NOT go. All of my classes are in the morning and they said they cant do anything about that so that sucks :/
Sigh... sorry..
I know.. do it for the money... but for some reason that makes me feel more pressured..

It's my choice at the end. I don't need anyone's bullshit at the moment and to be honest? I took cuz I felt so pressured by everyone. One of my friends FLIPPED at me when I told her.
Now I feel like I let everyone down, I feel like total crap. I'm a coward, a failure.
It was my decision and my decision only. No one can tell me what to do or control my life.

...

he.... pushed me again... i hit my head on the side and im bleeding....
..help me..

Birthday?

I have a feeling I wont have a good birthday.
My friend's schedule ruined plans...
sigh..
and not having the person you love the most makes it worse...

sighs...

God I wonder If you listen to me when I talk to you...
I know You do but like... why are the answers to my questions so hard to find?
Que debo hacer... porque soy asi, porque estoy pasando por esto... los obstaculos que la vida me ha puesto son demasiado dificiles... pero nada es imposible aunque lo parezca. Me desespero.

Me siento agotada emocionalmente. A veces pienso que si lo que me hace feliz durará para siempre... Tu ya sabes que es. Te pido que nada se interponga entre nosotros. No quieiera salir herida otra vez..
que todo salga bien.

Te pido que cuides a lo que me queda de familia. Que le des salud a mi mama... no quiero que se vuelva a enfermar. A mi abuela que se calme xD y que mi hermano madure. Y a mi papa, ayudale un poco, si?
Keep everyone I love safe. If they hurt... help them through it. Please.

Tu sabes que no soy una mala persona. Todo lo que esta pasando, tiene su motivo. Bueno o malo. Nada mejora.. las cosas empeoran.
I wish I had answers to everything... only You know them.

Also... please let us publish our book D': PREASE. Liek soon? I'LL PRAY EVERY NIGHT XD


Help me...